Saturday, February 5, 2011

Reality

So life if hard...life is AMAZING....life is dull...life IS...These past few months I have been fortunate to spend at home with my children. I LOVE being a mother I love being home..BUT it makes me crazy some days too! The reality of being home is a difficult, sometimes thankless job that never ends. I expected when I started my "new career" that my house would be spotless my children would be so well behaved because I would be patient and kind and we would speak in loving tones to each other. I would be frugal but fashionable our house would smell of homemade bread and love would gush out the sides. HAHA HA!!!HA I am still laughing at this image I have in my mind!! While there is plenty of love to go around in our house we still argue and my children continue to have trouble sharing and I can't seem to be frugal or fashionable!! BUT I love it and it's chaos...most days. =)
Now marriage...luckily I chose the right guy!! It's amazing how hard it is to show how much you love and appreciate your best friend. I have found myself taking him for granted, not expressing my true feelings DAILY...marriage is hard and without daily reminders we slowly loose connection. The only thing Chris truly asks for is for me to allow him to work out at home when he gets home from work. He doesn't want to go out with the boys, he doesn't want an expensive sports car, he doesn't WANT anything he is CONTENT with us with his life.
Content that is my new word. I am content my life is full ...but why is it so hard to feel it everyday? and I can tell you I have EVERY excuse known.."i'm tired, Mia didn't sleep, i don't feel comfortable in my clothes today, the weather stinks, I miss my family, the kids are soo difficult today....blah blah blah...NOT ANYMORE...I am going to stop the complaining stop the whining and JUST BE HAPPY!! I am going to date my husband I am going to patient and accepting of children. I know I am human and I know I am going to have bad days but I am not going to allow myself excuses. I am going to stick to my budget, I am going to MAKE and stick to my monthly goals!! I am going to be happy and content with the choice I made to take a time out from my career to be with my children, for ME and MY family this is what we want and are willing to make the sacrifices that come with that.

3 comments:

the irelands said...

Amy,

It's so good to see a post from you! We have been following you for the past couple of months waiting for the next update in life and I am so glad to see you are still blogging. Matt and I just started recently and to tell you the truth, my goal was to start with July and catch up our lives with our friends and family but it is definately a time consuming job when the family computer is not the fastest. We miss you so much and are embarassed that I haven't kept in better touch with you all! Talk about excuses, but it seems at the end of the day there's either time to rest for 30min or time to call people, and lately, resting sounds fabulous! Sweetheart, I share your struggles as a mother and I think no matter what position you are in, stay at home, part time employee, full time, etc, we end up having unattainable goals for ourselves and then beat ourselves up for not reaching them. Your children are fed, loved, disciplined, strong enough to take up for themselves with each other (to mommy's dismay most of the time), and you love and cherish your husband even when some days seem to run together like they do in "Groundhog Day." A little tidbit into our life that I haven't posted yet is that we are 8wks pregnant. Talk about not wanting to do anything, the couch has become my second bed, and that in and of itself makes me think I am less of a wife/mommy. I should be baking cookies only to take out a 1min break to throw up in the toilet....then reality sets in and I know Matty and the boys love me for who I am. You are a fabulous woman,mom, and wife! You always have been! Love Always, Jennifer
PS our blogspot is theirishblessings.blogspot.com come follow if you'd like! Miss you to pieces!

Jaime said...

That IS life!! You got it!! Now if only I could remember these great pearls of wisdom all day every day so I'd always feel so happy. :) Good luck to all us mamas!!

Jolene Warren said...

AMEN.